


i knew from the song that you sang, you were my lover for life

by cherrysalad



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Dreams and Nightmares, F/F, Light Angst, Post-Hogwarts, Post-War, Slow Burn, ginny has a hard time coming to terms with her sexuality, luna is patient and supportive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2017-12-23
Packaged: 2019-02-18 19:15:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13106760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherrysalad/pseuds/cherrysalad
Summary: Ginny thinks to herself how she would be more than happy to spend the rest of her days here with Luna.





	i knew from the song that you sang, you were my lover for life

 

They move in together the spring after they graduate from Hogwarts. It's the logical thing to do, neither of them can afford a place on their own and they're one another's closest friends, so they rent out a little flat in London together. It's nice, nothing luxurious, but nothing awful either, four rooms, all very plain.

At least until Luna starts in on it, she makes it their own, painting the walls with beautiful pictures of dragons and mermaids and stone castles. Ginny travels a lot with the Harpies and every time she returns home she swear there's a new painting to look at.

That spring is difficult, Ginny knows she should be happy, the war is over, she has a job she loves, but sometimes she feels like the war did so much damage that she'll never be able to feel happy again, there are times when she comes close, but even then, there's a cold, heavy feeling lingering in the pit of her stomach.

She's had nightmares consistently since she was twelve and possessed by Voldemort, but that spring they worsen, become nearly unbearable.

They don't make sense, there is no narrative, just flashing images of gore and horror, generally anything that makes Ginny feel sick to her stomach. After being shocked awake by a particularly horrible dream, she pads across the hall to Luna's room. She would never do something like that fully awake, but she's caught in a half conscious state, trembling with fear and disgust at the images that her own mind manages to conjure up.

"Luna," She whispers and shakes her friend awake "Do you mind if I sleep with you tonight?" Luna just smiles knowingly and lifts up the covers so Ginny can crawl under.

Ginny sleeps soundly and dreamlessly the rest of the night.

***

Summer is so hot that year that it feels like it's burning Ginny from the inside out. The nightmares become so bad that Ginny does everything she can to avoid them, including forcing herself to stay awake for hours and hours until Luna finds her staring blankly at the wall around two in the morning and gently guides her to bed.

"Stay with me," Ginny whispers. Luna sits down beside her, takes Ginny's head into her lap and sings her a lullaby.

" _Lullaby and goodnight,_  
With roses bedight,  
With lilies o'er spread"

Her voice is sweet, dreamy, soft like everything else about her.

Quidditch is grueling that summer, they have practice almost every day and Ginny always comes home sweaty and dirty and exhausted.

Luna is always in the living room (well, they call it that, but it functions as more of Luna's studio than anything else), painting or playing the piano. Ginny will stand in the doorway and watch her, remaining silent until Luna notices her and says with a soft smile,

"Oh, hello Ginny. You look tired, why don't you go take a shower while I make dinner?" Or something of that variety.

And every evening while she showers Ginny thinks to herself how she would be more than happy to spend the rest of her days here with Luna, she knows that it's a foolish thought, that that's not something friends do, but Ginny has never met anyone else she'd want to spend her life with.

***

She's in Diagon Alley one afternoon picking up some new quills for Luna when she runs into Lavender Brown.

"Ginny!" Lavender greets her enthusiastically "I haven't seen you in ages. How are you?"

"I'm good," Ginny says "You know, as good as I can be," Lavender nods in understanding. Ginny knows she lost a brother in the war "How are you?"

"I'm very well, actually. I just got married," Lavender gushes.

"Oh that's wonderful. Would I know him?" Lavender chuckles.

"You would, but it's not a him. I married Pavarti," Ginny's eyes widen in surprise.

"Oh," Ginny says, flustered "Well, tell her I said hello,"

That night, Ginny lies awake and stares at her ceiling where Luna has painted a night sky full of stars. Every so often a comet or shooting star will drift across the ceiling. She thinks about Lavender and Pavarti. She thinks about them back at school, always together, always leaning into one another's space. She had just thought they were remarkably close friends.

That night Ginny dreams, but not of her loved ones brutalized bodies and blank eyes, but of a delicate hand closed around her own, of soft lips pressed to her forehead, of someones warm body against her own.

She's awoken from her dream in the early hours of the morning by a voice singing in the other room. She listens to Luna's voice, surprisingly clear as it drifts from the living room.

" _Compass points your home_  
Calling out from the east  
Compass points you anywhere  
Closer to me," Luna sings, Ginny lets the song lull her back to sleep and plunge her back into the first pleasant dream she's had in years.

***

Slowly, but surely Summer fades away, the leaves explode in fiery reds and golds and the air acquires a bitter chill.

Luna loves fall, which only makes Ginny appreciate it more, they go on long walks in the evening and sit and talk for hours in muggle coffee shops drinking tea and mulled cider.

Ginny's nightmares are as bad as ever, but she begins to make a habit of climbing into Luna's bed because it's the only thing that seems to bring relief.

"You can just come to bed with me, you know. Maybe then you won't have the dreams in the first place," Luna says one night, so Ginny does.

***

"Luna?" Ginny asks, they're sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast one morning.

"Yes, Ginny?" Luna looks up from The Daily Prophet (which has become a lot more reputable after Rita Skeeter was fired).

"You know how you've been saying that your paintings are taking up too much space in the living room? Well, if you wanted you could put some of them in my bedroom, since I don't really use it anymore," Luna quirked up the side of her mouth at Ginny and reached across to table to cover Ginny's hand with her own.

"I'd like that very much, Ginny, thank you,"

***

"What are your plans for Christmas, this year?" Ginny asks Luna cautiously.

"Oh, I don't really have any. You know how things are with my father right now," Ginny nods.

"You should come home with me," Ginny suggests, Luna shakes her head.

"I would want to intrude," Luna says.

"Luna, don't be ridiculous, you're coming home with me for Christmas," Ginny says decisively. Luna smiles, amused.

"Okay, then. I suppose I am,"

***

It's a bittersweet Christmas, their first without Fred. Molly is smiling big and bright throughout the while things, but sometimes it looks more like a grimace than anything. George doesn't even put up any false pretense of happiness, just sits and stares contemplatively at his hands.

Ginny helps her mum prepare the meal along with Harry, Ron, Luna and Hermione.

"You need to visit more often Ginny, dear. Or at the very least send an owl every so often," Ginny's mother chides her.

"I know, mum," Ginny says sheepishly "I've been really busy with quidditch, but I'll try and be better about it now that the season is over,"

"Alright," Molly says incredulously "So what have you been up to, since you've never even sent an owl to tell us?" Molly asks.

"Other than quidditch? Well, nothing really," Ginny answers.

"Not seeing anyone?" Her voice is tense, nervous for a reason Ginny can't decipher.

"No, mum, not right now," She answers, Molly bites her lip.

Dinner is quiet, the conversation is only a soft murmur and you can hear the clinking of utensils against dishes.

Afterwards, they exchange gifts. Ginny gets some books, a sweater of course, and a painting of herself flying on a broom through the starry night sky from Luna. She gives Luna a book of poetry that she loves, Luna smiles affectionately and hugs her. Hermione is looking at them, a secretive smile on her face.

It's well into the night when Ginny and Luna decide to make an exit. Just before they're about to leave, Hermione asks to speak to Ginny in private.

"I wanted to give you this," Hermione says "But I didn't want to do it in front of your mum because it doesn't seem like you're out to her yet," And then she hands Ginny a package, wrapped in plain brown paper, leaving Ginny confused.

She opens the package carefully at the kitchen table when she arrives home, the book is bound in plain leather with the words 'A History Of Queer Sexuality In the Wizarding World' written in gold. Luna, who's making tea looks at it over her shoulder.

"Who gave you that?" She says calmly.

"Hermione," Ginny says.

"Hermione has always been so thoughtful," Luna says with a smile and then before Ginny can respond she says "What kind of tea would you like?"

***

Later that night, Ginny is lying in bed alone and wide awake when she hears the soft piano music start in the next room, and then the voice, cool and clear.

" _O silent night_ ," Luna sings. Ginny gets out of bed and steps softly into the living room. All the lights are out save for a candle flickering in the window and the fairy lights decorating the Christmas tree. Ginny stands behind Luna and rests her hands on her shoulders, Luna isn't startled when Ginny touches her, just leans back against her and continues playing the piano.

Ginny closes her eyes and lets Luna's voice consume her.

***

The winter is long and cold and since there's no quidditch Ginny doesn't have anywhere to go. It also means that Luna has to cover the rent with the money she makes from her paintings. Ginny feels guilty about it, but Luna assures her that it's alright, even if it means that they have to live off ramen noodles for weeks on end.

Ginny spends most of her time reading and wishing that spring would return quickly. She keeps the book that Hermione gave her under the bed and tries not to think about it.

Luna plays piano a lot during those long months, Ginny watches her. She loves to see Luna's long, graceful fingers dance over the keys, loves the way the music sounds.

"Luna?" She asks one morning as Luna sits down on the piano bench and readies herself to play.

"Mm?" Luna makes an inquisitive noise.

"Do you think you could teach me how to play?" Luna turns to her and smiles.

"I'd love to, Ginny,"

Ginny finds she likes learning how to play the piano, she especially likes learning from Luna who's kind and endlessly patient. They spend hours sitting on the bench side by sitting, Luna's hands guiding hers to the right keys, overlapping into one another's space a bit more than necessary.

***

The snow begins to thaw, and with it so does everything else. Quidditch starts up again and Ginny goes to practice and plays harder than ever, everyone is impressed. She continues to learn to play the piano and Luna tells her she has talent. Sometimes they stay up late in to the night, Ginny playing the piano while Luna sings.

Ginny's nightmares had been getting progressively more infrequent since she started sleeping in Luna's bed, but that spring they drop off almost completely.

In May, Ron and Hermione move into an apartment a few blocks away, so they spend a lot of time together. One night she and Luna go out for drinks with them at a muggle bar, it's close to their apartment so they walk home. Ginny is a little drunk and has her arm thrown around Luna's shoulder.

They walk under a tree that's blooming with pale pink flowers, petals floating down from its' branches. Ginny stops and looks at Luna, the moon is full and bright that night, it shines down through through the trees and bathes Luna in silver.

She looks so otherworldly and exquisite standing there, flower petals stuck in her hair and Ginny finds that she can't breath for a moment.

"You're so beautiful," She says "Luna I–I'm so. I don't know–" She stammers and struggles for a few minutes, not sure how to voice her thoughts in a way that makes sense. Luna takes her hands and squeezes them,

"Ginny," She says gently "I know you're struggling with your feelings right now. You can take your time. I'll wait for as long you need,"

***

Ginny crouches down and reaches under her bed, her hand finds the smooth leather of the book she's looking for; A History of Queer Sexuality In The Wizarding World. She sits on the bed, opens it to the first page and begins to read.

It's a process, coming to terms with the way she feels about Luna. They way she feels about girls. It's hard to even let herself put it into the form of a concrete thought.

She spends a lot of time thinking, driving herself mad over it.

Then suddenly, the invitation arrives. Harry is getting married, Ginny nearly spits out her mouthful of cereal when she sees to who.

 _You are cordially invited to the marriage of Draco L. Malfoy and Harry J. Potter_ , the invitation reads.

"What is it?" Luna asks.

"Harry's getting married," She says.

"Oh that's nice. Do we know his fiancé?"

"We do. You'll never believe who it is," Luna tilts her head inquisitively "Draco Malfoy," It takes a lot to surprise Luna, but at this she widens her eyes.

"Oh. Well, that's rather unexpected," She says.

"That's the understatement of the century," Ginny mutters, more to herself than to Luna.

***

Ginny asks Harry if he wants to go get dinner the day she gets the invitation, Harry agrees. They meet at a restaurant in Diagon Alley.

"Ginny!" Harry greets her grinning, he stands up and pulls her into a one armed hug "It's been so long, since Christmas, right?"

"Yeah," Ginny says with a teasing smile "You've certainly gotten up to a lot since then," Harry chuckles.

"I guess you got the invitation, then?" He says.

"Yep. So what's this about? You're marrying Draco Malfoy?" She asks.

"Uh, yeah," He said "We kind of got to be friends during our last year at school and well... one thing led to another I guess,"

"Well. That's good. He's really changed?"

"Yeah, yeah he has," Harry says, smiling softly.

"Can I ask you something personal?"

"Shoot," Harry says.

"When did you... when did you realize you were into men?" She asks. Harry takes a moment to respond.

"Sometimes it's not really about that," Harry says "Sometimes it's that you like someone for who they are and they just happen to be of one gender or the other," Ginny stares thoughtfully at her plate. "Does that make sense?"

"Yes," Ginny answers "Yes, it makes perfect sense."

***

She thinks about it.

She thinks about how unappealing the concept of spending her life with anyone but Luna is, she thinks about how her nightmares only cease when she sleeps beside Luna, she thinks about Luna's limitless kindness and patience and her smiles and her enchanting singing voice.

Ginny has found a soulmate, and that matters more that anything.

If that soulmate happens to be a woman? Ginny decides that doesn't matter at all.

***

When Ginny opens the door to her apartment she can hear Luna's voice in the living room. She's singing, it's a song that Ginny recognizes, one Luna has sang before,

" _If we make it out alive, from the depths of the seas_  
Compass points you anywhere  
Closer to me,"

She takes off her heels and walks quietly across the dark living room, up to Luna, who stops singing and lets her hands fall from the piano keys.

"Hello, Ginny," Luna says, and swings her legs over to the other side of the piano bench so she's facing Ginny.

Ginny kneels in front of her and drops her head into Luna's lap, she strokes Ginny's hair with her gentle fingers.

"Luna," Ginny says.

"Yes?" Luna asks.

"I'm in love with you,"

"I'm in love with you too, Ginny," Luna says calmly, quietly. Ginny lifts her head up and looks at Luna, who's smiling. She smiles back.

"Come here," Ginny says, curling her hand around the back of Luna's neck, Luna obliges, closing the space between them and kissing Ginny, softly, gently. Luna sighs contentedly against her mouth.  
  
The kiss tastes like Finally, it tastes like an apology, it tastes like everything that Ginny never had the courage to say.

It tastes like 'I want to spend the rest of eternity with you'


End file.
